Thriving Goals: More Than Just Resolutions
As the new year unfolds, many of us set resolutions, intentions, or select a guiding word. It's a time of beginnings and an opportunity to reflect and reset.
But did you know that the second Friday in January is the “quit date”?
This is when many abandon their New Year goals. But why is it so challenging to stick to these goals in the first place?
Understanding the Nature of Goals
The challenge in sticking to our New Year's resolutions often stems from a fundamental misunderstanding of the nature of goals. Goals, in isolation, are incomplete.
They're not standalone achievements but rather the final piece of a much larger puzzle.
Imagine your life's journey as a road trip. Your goals are the destinations you plan to stop at along the way.
However, without a map or a final destination in mind, these stops might seem random and unfulfilling.
That's why goals, while important, are not the entirety of your journey. They are milestones that mark progress toward a more significant, overarching mission.
So, the bigger question is: Do you have a mission?
Crafting a Personal Mission
There are many times throughout our lives when we may find ourselves asking big, existential questions – Who am I? What’s my purpose? Who am I becoming? These are mission-based questions.
And, if you can answer those questions at some point, decisions you need to make then become easier – Does this align with my life’s mission?
The first time I had an opportunity to consider this idea of a personal mission statement, I was 21 and in my second year at Teacher’s College.
I had already decided in my first semester that I did not want to be a traditional classroom teacher, so the exercise of writing a mission statement was a little deeper for me.
My training was specific to a career I no longer desired, but I cherished the learning experience and the community. If I’m being really honest, there was nothing for me to go back to, so I stayed. I figured what I was meant to do next would show up at some point.
This period shaped my mission. Becoming an educator was the foundation.
Grounding in Values
To craft a personal mission statement, start by identifying your personal values. Imagine values as the outermost layer of a nesting doll, with the mission and goals nestled within. Understanding your values provides a solid foundation for your mission and subsequent goals.
In the corporate world, values often manifest as a vision, sometimes blurring the lines between mission and vision statements. In our personal lives, vision represents how we embody our core values in our daily lives, influencing our families and communities.
Before you can ever be successful in achieving your goals, they need to be anchored in the values and support the mission you have in your life.
Goals anchored in your values and mission are more than mere checkboxes; they're steps toward fulfilling your greater purpose.
Reflecting on Values
In my book, Thriving In Chaos: How to Have Hope and Purpose in a World of Constant Change, I emphasize digging deep into chosen values to understand the 'why' behind them.
For example, if you value financial security, ask yourself why it's important. Often, the true value emerges a few layers down. “I wouldn’t have to worry so much.” gives way to “I would have more free time.” and then “I could spend worry-free time with my family.” —Looking deeper into our values reveals their true nature.
For me, the new year is a time of reflection. If you have never reflected on your values, I would encourage you to take some time to consider what you truly value in life. If you need help, I love this activity from Taproot: Live Your Core Values: 10-Minute Exercise to Increase Your Success.
Setting Goals: Manifesting Your Mission
Your mission statement often emerges naturally from your values. Your mission is twofold: who you want to become and what you feel is your purpose.
Goals are the means to manifest your mission. They are meant to be set and reset depending on the circumstances of our lives. However, they continue to be the action (or inaction) we take in the fulfillment of our purpose.
If you have never done the reflective work around values and mission, I would encourage you to spend some time there.
The Difference Between Striving and Thriving Goals
Goals can be a part of a thriving life. The key difference between striving and thriving goals is their foundation. Striving goals often stand alone, making them challenging to maintain. Thriving goals, on the other hand, are integrated into your life's narrative. They're not just checkboxes but stepping stones towards the life you envision.
As you step into the new year, I encourage you to reflect on your values and consider crafting a personal mission statement. This process can transform how you set and pursue goals, shifting from mere striving to truly thriving.
